Courting A Potion's Master
by Ice Threat Power
Summary: Remus has been alone since Sirius died. Severus is used to not having anyone to rely on. When Remus asks about a pet project Severus is working on, the game begins. Now, Remus is trying to watch his moves and deal with a war. Slash RL/SS AU-HBP
1. Chapter 1

It had been three weeks, five days and twelve hours since Siri—_he _had died. Remus choked on the very thought and frantically gulped down the tea, no matter how burning, to rid himself of that thought. Molly told him that if he didn't get up, she was afraid the chair would eat him. Being in the noblest House of Black, Remus considered this before starting his rotations of chairs as to confuse them, if not everyone else in the damned house.

Several times had he already declined offers for chess games, prank help, and conversation. He was grieving, he didn't need a minder. Morosely, Remus reminded himself he had already lost his friends, this was just fate showing she did indeed hate him. If anyone needed the minder, it was Harry Potter and he was stuck with his relatives in the muggle world.

Remus sat pondering that thought. The muggle world might be a good vacation spot. Dumbledore had him communicating with the werewolves but he could do that from anywhere with the proper charms. All he needed was a – was he out of his mind? There was a war going on and he was going to take a vacation? Bloody hell, he needed to get it together.

"Talking to one's self is the first sign of mental deterioration," Remus jumped at the sound, not realizing anyone was there.

"Hullo Severus," Remus greeted the dark man lightly. "As I wasn't speaking out loud, I don't think it counts."

Severus however had already turned his back to the werewolf and was gently picking out books and setting them back. Remus learned to pick them up gently too after one slashed his hand open.

"Are you looking for something in particular?" asked Remus, Severus turned and gave an incredulously look.

"Amazing that after two weeks of everyone fawning over your every word that now you decide to hold a conversation," he snarked. Remus didn't take the bait.

"Maybe they weren't worth conversing with," Remus replied lightly. He actually didn't know why he was so interested in what Severus was doing. Everyone else wanted to talk about Sirius, and he would bet his wolfsbane that Severus would die before talking about him. Strangely Remus was ok with that.

"Few willingly seek me out for my conversational skills," Severus said silkily, finally pulling a book free before guiding into an empty chair semi close to Remus. The graying man thought it was a start.

"That's a shame," and Remus meant it. The man was brilliant.

Severus again raised an eyebrow at him and Remus knew, though he tried his damnest, that he blushed. Severus said nothing but turned back to the book he was holding.

Remus tapped his fingers against the arm of his chair. He couldn't think of anything to say to the man. This was really the first conversation they had ever had in which he wasn't on the defense of a verbal attack from the other man. Not that he minded a verbal sparring every now and then. That was something that Remus wouldn't tell the other man.

He glanced over at this half empty tea cup and reached out to take a sip anyway. Ugh, it was disgusting. Luke warm chai tea was not as good as hot chai tea. He wondered what happened to the English Breakfast that he always kept. He would need to investigate. Even if it meant going into Molly Weasley's domain.

"Would you kindly keep your fingers still," Severus finally snapped at the man. Remus hadn't realized that he was doing. He also realized that was the nicest rude thing Severus had said to him all day. Oh bloody hell, he sounded like a teenager with a crush.

"Sorry," Remus stuttered. "I hadn't even realized I was doing it."

"Are you bored, Lupin?" asked Severus, eyes still on his book and fingers grasped onto a quill as he wrote down notes. How Remus wanted to be that quill. "Lupin?"

Remus jumped and tore his eyes from… the quill.

"Huh? Oh, sorry Severus," he stumbled over words. "Yes, I suppose you can say I am. I'm only so useful to the order right now and until Dumbledore give me the green light for field work, I'm afraid I'm stuck."

"Sounds dreadful," Severus scathed.

"Do you have a task that you could use an extra set of eyes on?" Remus knew better to even breathe the word help around the other man. "I don't have anything going on."

"Two heads are better than one?" the darker man asked, raising his eyebrow again. Remus stared fascinated at how easily he did it. He had tried as a teenager, staring in the mirror for hours. Not that he would admit that either.

"It never hurt," Remus shrugged lightly.

Severus gave a considering look for a long moment before a slight nod and Remus took that as permission to move his chair closer to the other man. Severus watched him until he sat down before shifting his notes so Remus could also read.

"What exactly am I looking at," asked Remus, taking in the sketches and the notes about ingredients.

"This is information about the 'Drought of the Living Death'. I remember your performance in potions to remember you weren't a complete dolt," Severus explained. "I am trying to alter the formula without completely debasing it. It has… challenged me, to say the least."

"What are you trying to do with it?" Remus asked, leaning closer to the man to observe his notes.

"Keep a level of consciousness, so that the person can sense the world around them but still be in a coma like state," Severus answered, frowning deeply at the words on the page. "I have continued my research into dreamless sleep to see if any leads would come from there. I still have not yet decided which is the most stable to work with."

"Can I ask what this would do?" Remus watched the lines of Severus' frown deepen.

"It would be a healing trance, used by healers to conduct work on a person that would allow for continual consciousness," Severus explained. "Say a person needed mind magic. Dreamless Sleep shuts down the consciousness that allows people to dream. Drought of the Living Death mimics death and does the same at a lesser rate. I want something in between with full consciousness."

"So that someone can go into the mind while the person is still in this coma-like state?" asked Remus.

"Exactly," Severus nodded, looking up at Remus for the first time. Remus gave him a gentle smile. "Suddenly those people who could not be healed without deep sedation may not be treated."

"Have you checked out the library here, beyond the book just in the sitting room," Remus questioned, motioning to the door opposite of the one Severus entered. Severus looked up in surprise.

"No, I have mainly been using my private collection as well as Hogwart's library," Severus replied. "I have not yet stepped foot in this library. Anytime I am here it is usually for a purpose."

"Well," Remus began, "Maybe you can drop by for other reasons now as well."

Severus stopped writing and looked up at Remus, his face betraying nothing but Remus could smell the anxiety on him before suddenly it just disappeared. Remus didn't even know why he had said such a thing, but Severus hadn't left nor hit him so he supposed it was a start.

"Very well," he agreed, much to Remus' surprise. Remus leaned in a bit, enjoying the smell of Severus when – BANG.

Molly Weasley had the WORST timing in the world. Remus and Severus both jumped with Remus pushing himself away from the other man.

"Boys," she said, as took in the sight of the papers, book, and of course the close proximity of the two. "Dinner is almost ready."

"Thank you, Molly," Remus said, smiling at her. She grinned back before leaving them in peace again. "I should go freshen up before dinner and the meeting. It has been two quiet for my peace of mind, Merlin only knows what the twins are up to."

Severus made a noise of agreement but had gone back to his notes and seemed to be ignoring Remus again. Remus swore that pain in his chest was from Molly bursting into the room. He couldn't be falling for the dark Death Eater


	2. Chapter 2

AN: This is my first story in a LONG time folks (I'm talking like half a decade). I am taking some liberties but trying to stay somewhat canon. May be OOC. This isn't completely a love story.

Love to all my reviewers! You all really pushed me to get this chapter done (and to try my damnest not to suck). I was amazed at the response from this little plot bunny and hope I can maintain the standards set.

Need beta: please apply!

Disclaimer: Own nothing.

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><p><strong>Chapter 2<strong>

Remus Lupin was many things, A lover of books, a truly gentle soul and even a runes expert. Few people knew this, but Remus was also a fool.

It had to be true, he thought, why else would he be trekking through the mountains of Scotland at the end of June in search of a werewolf pack that may kill him on sight? Yes, definitely a fool.

The real reason Remus took this assignment was _Albus Dumbledore_ had asked him to communicate with packs about their loyalty towards the Dark Lord and the war in general. Ever dutifully, Remus had sent letter after letter to pack leaders and alphas to secure meetings. Only one had been truly kind to his intrusion of privacy. That Remus hadn't expected. He hadn't expected _any_ to be kind.

While not personally connected, he knew wolf packs were very close; children were often dropped off as soon as they were turned and they grew up within this community. Adults that had been biten normally chose a pack that suited their basic needs and adapted at a stunning rate. Packs ran together during moons. Older werewolves taught the young how to survive both as wolf and as human. With all the laws and formalities within the wizarding world and the need for complete anonymity in the muggle one, the pack only had each other to depend on. They loved and understood each other. It was like infiltrating a family.

Remus had no pack. He was unaffiliated. He was formally educated. He had known loyalties to wizards. He was a known protestor of the Dark Lord during the first war and nothing had changed this time either.

That is why Remus had declared himself a fool. He may have been trekking to his death.

Remus was beginning to regret doing this. There was one pack in particular that he wanted to scout. Albus didn't require this of him, but after Remus suggested it, there was no turning back.

Remus approached the pack on a whim. They were technically neutrals in most conflicts. Remus knew one of the Alphas, who entered school a few years after Remus. He had been educated before he was turned. His name was Emerson Bagnold, son of the former minister Millicent Bagnold. After his turn, his mother publically disowned him. It was a shocking blow to the lycanthropic community, who had been expecting more support from the minister after her eldest was bitten. Instead, the minister took up the cause of more control for these "beasts". Emerson fled England after his house was attacked by those protesting his living so close to a wizarding community.

Remus had been in contact with Emerson since their school days for purely personal reasons. Emerson had been a Ravenclaw while Remus was a notable Gryffindor. They had known each other in school but never had been close. It was Emerson who sought Remus for advice after he was bitten. It was Remus who had given him the suggestion to flee and gave him some contacts to well known packs.

It was Emerson that Remus was going to meet now.

Remus reached into his pocket to consult the map he was owled when his hand hit a package. Remus pulled out the lump and unwrapped it carefully. He pulled off a piece of parchment that was bound to an empty veil, recognizing the flowing writing immediately.

_Lupin, as you mostly likely unaware, the bottom of Cairngorm Mountain holds large amounts of Valerian. As you should know, Valerian is a key ingredient in Drought of the Living Death. Do be somewhat useful and gather some roots. I will retrieve them upon your return._

Remus smiled in spite of the snark and insults to his intelligence as he read between the lines. Only Severus would be able to affront him and show he cared at the same time.

Remus tucked the note back into his pocket and planned to gather the roots on his trip back down. He looked briefly at his map before adjusting his course slightly and walking again. It wasn't long before Remus caught the scent of the pack. He felt the air around him change. He had entered marked territory.

"Remus Lupin," a shadowed figure called from ahead. Remus gave a wave as he quickly hiked up to wear the man was standing under the shade of a giant pine tree.

"Emerson," Remus smiled, shaking the man's hand. "My, it has been a while."

"Over a decade and change," The dark haired man said, sweeping Remus into a hug. "You look well, amazing actually, considering how long…"

Remus nodded. His gray hair wasn't merely because of poor genetics. His constant access to Wolfsbane and a trusted Potion's Master had allowed him to stay in good health.

"I've had help," Remus replied and Emerson hummed in agreement.

"We've not had the same luck," Emerson looked towards a walled area about three meters from where they were standing. "After a poisoned batch killed two cubs and nearly maimed three others… well, being Dumbledore's minion does have its perks, ay?"

Remus furrowed his brow, "I wouldn't say minion. It's not like You-Know-Who. I'm here because-"

"You 'care about the packs and don't want innocents being killed unnecessarily by irrational evil'," Emerson grinned, showing off his canines in the sun. "Did I get that right?"

"Word for word," Remus agreed. "You were around for the first war, Emerson. You may have been young and in a different frame of mind but you were there."

"You think it'll be different because I'm a dark creature now?" Emerson snarled. "I am a different person but my memories are still the same. I'm not about to kneel to a man who thinks of me as a creature. We would have more freedom under the Dark Lord, I know that, but what is that worth? We are not all bloodlusting monsters while in human form. You know this Remus. We are not all Fenrir Greyback."

Remus flinched, at both the name and the accusation.

"I know that more than anyone," Remus protested. "But the ministry has burned many bridges and I need to understand the picture of who is the enemy."

Emerson pushed off the tree he was leaning against as Remus watched the younger man pace back and forth. Remus understood why he was an Alpha of this pack. Emerson was showing great strength and diplomacy. He would have been an amazing politician, Remus thought suddenly and pushed that thought away. It was best to learn early to not think of all the limitation on werewolves and to focus on the open opportunities, what little there were.

"My pack is not the enemy," said Emerson, finally facing Remus. "But we will not be slaves of the light either. Come, we have gathered the community. You will dine with us tonight."

Remus let his eyes widen fractionally. He was not prepared to be allowed entrance to the pack, but quickly changed his surprise to determination. Remus would need all of his charm to pass this test, and failing it could mean so many things, none of which Remus was prepared to think about.

**&&RLSS&&RLSS&&RLSS&&RLS&&SRLSS&&**

It was nearly midnight by the time Remus was able to apparate back to Grimmauld Place. After being introduced to the Elders and the Alphas, some of which were not the same, Remus was pushed onto a soapbox to begin an impromptu speech about the necessity of good werewolf relations and about his own beliefs.

Remus was surprised at the calm. The community had prepared a feast of local game and vegetables. Remus stood near Emerson the entire time, allowing all pack members to stop and speak with him. He didn't get to eat much but he was able to extend his message.

Before he was escorted back toward the end of the forest, Emerson helped him find and gather Valerian. They spoke a bit about Hogwarts, politics and sports. Remus had not let his guard down for a second. There were certainly people in the pack that were not in agreement of his cause and he feared retribution. He knew Emerson wasn't walking him out to be polite. He needed the protection and no one was willing to attack the young Alpha.

Emerson said he would keep in touch, telling Remus about the response to his visit and local feelings with the clan. Emerson would stay with his pack, no matter the decision. Remus understood that. They parted with a handshake and promise of continued communication.

As Remus entered the kitchen, he sunk into a chair and allowed the stress to flow out of him. Molly had left him a plate of food with a note. A flourish of his wand and he was eating the brilliant cooking of the Weasley matriarch.

"Well you haven't died," a voice said from the doorway. Remus choked on his food, not having heard anyone move about the old house. "Merlin, Lupin. You did not spend all day frolicking in the forest to perish on a braised fowl."

Remus coughed and took a sip of water that Severus held out for him.

"Thank you, Severus," he said, dabbing his mouth with his serviette. "I have the Valerian root that you requested." Remus placed the vial on the table and watched as the dark man glided into a chair across from him.

"You are not completely worthless after all," Severus quipped, examining the plants. "I suppose your little adventure was not completely worthless then?"

"No," Remus smiled. "Not at all. Emerson Bagnold sends his regards."

"He was one of the few tolerable Ravenclaws in his year," Severus remarked, sounding almost pleasant. "Shame about his father's death. Mauled by a vampire who was after his wife. How anyone could misidentify that hag is beyond me."

Remus laughed, "Yes well, Emerson said his mother has taken residence abroad in Germany, apparently they have family there. He seems to be doing well at least."

"I'm assuming he had some merit?" Severus drawled, appearing uninterested while gently swiveling the vial of Valerian.

Remus silently obliged his curiosity and began detailing his trip to Scotland. He couldn't think of a better end to his night. Well, he paused after seeing the slight curl of Severus' lips at the mention of Emerson's constant companionship, Remus could think of several different ways it could be better but settled for sitting and finishing his dinner with light conversation.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Sorry this took so long; real life has kicked me in the pants. Updates should flow smoothly from now on.

To my lovely reviews: you all are the best and I take to heart every comment you leave for me.

Kudos points to those who can guess the reference at the end.

Disclaimer: Still nada and not looking up.

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><p><strong>Chapter 3<strong>

He would have sold his soul not to be at this meeting.

Forget that he had sold his soul to enter the front door. Should he ever have some free time to go mess with the past using a Time Turner, he would persuade his parents that France had a much better education for him or maybe an Asian school. It just seemed like knowing Albus Dumbledore could be more trouble than it was worth at times.

However, Remus knew that without Dumbledore, his life would have been much worse. So he let the dream of owning a Time Turner go and instead tried to focus on the meeting at hand. This was important stuff after all.

"I do believe we have heard from everyone who has had important contributions and assigned the tasks that need to be completed," Dumbledore clasped his hands together and gave the room a nod. "I shall be in touch with each of you later this week in order to gather reports and status updates. As such I leave you with the normal warning to be safe and careful."

Well, bullocks. Remus glanced around the room as some of the members chatted a bit before they were taking their leave. He saw Tonks heading towards him and deftly slipped out the door. He peaked around a corner to see if she was following when he ran into a solid mass.

"Oof," Remus grunted as he balanced himself on the wall.

"I thought the proper term was 'woof'," sneered Severus Snape, who also was focused on balancing himself. "Apparently failures in pronunciation have affected your eyesight?"

"Your wit is endless," Remus said. "Sorry about the bump. I was…"

"Running away after misplacing all of that Gryffindor courage?" Severus cut in, brushing off his robes.

Remus didn't rise to the bait. They began walking towards an unused parlor.

"Tonks has seemed to think I require constant companionship," Remus explained. "Luckily she can't go far without bumping into something, so it's easy to hear her coming."

Severus held open the door and let the shorter man in.

"How she manages to be stealthy as an Auror is truly beyond all my comprehension," he remarked, taking a seat at two of the overstuffed chairs that occupied the room.

"She's a good person," Remus said, lighting a few candles around the room with flicks of his arm. "Hard worker … dedicated to the cause."

"What an inane turn of phrase," Severus quipped. "Dedicated to the cause."

"Do you think she isn't?" Remus asked. "She wouldn't be here nearly as much if she wasn't…if we all weren't."

"It is not that I doubt any member's attempts at dedication," Severus stated harshly, looking towards the window. "Dedication, however, can be bought and sold to the highest bidder. That Dark Lord has become steadfast in his attempts of recruitment."

"People are becoming convinced of his cause then?" Remus asked, intrigued by this shift in conversation.

"Considering how well you focused at the last meeting, I am surprised you are abreast of any facts in this war at all," Remus rolled his eyes but did not respond. "The Dark Lord is cunning, he has always been so. He attracted many powerful and willing followers during the first war, lest you forget. His descent into madness has fogged many of the principles he had advocated in the past. His obsession with Potter has done nothing for his reputation. But he is feared. And fear is a means of control."

"Will it be the means to his end?" Remus asked softly, looking at the dark man who now stood in front of the murky window.

"You have been through war before," Severus sneered. "It is the pawns that will be the means. Sacrifice shall be necessary for the 'greater good', or haven't you heard?"

"I fear for the children," Remus finally said after a long moment. "Why are we forcing them to sacrifice so much so soon?"

"Do you want them to have a future?" Severus turned and glared at Remus. "We will not be the ones to solve the problems of the Wizarding World. Our generation is too invested. We are already pawns and we will be their means. Their childhood is over and as long as they want to see adulthood, they will be involved."

"That is the price of war," Remus agreed solemnly. "For good to triumph against evil. For the freedom of the masses. The causalities will define where we stand and how much we were willing to give."

"A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it," Severus murmured, barely loud enough for Remus to hear it.

"Who said that?" Remus asked gently going to stand near the stoic man.

"Oscar Wilde," Severus replied.

"A muggle?" Severus nodded.

Remus moved back to the chair and sat in silence. Severus shook his head and followed not far behind, relaxing into the chair and closing his eyes.

"When you gave yourself to them," Remus began gently, "did you ever think that it wasn't worth it? That your sanity wasn't worth it?"

"You have," Severus looked at the other man. "Or you wouldn't have asked. Redundancy is a waste of time, Lupin. "

Remus stared hard, "Those who will fight the hardest will be defined by their past choices or the choices made for them."

"Are you waiting for a damned metal? Your absolution?" Severus asked. "Why are you here, Lupin? What are you fighting for?"

"I don't know," Remus muttered, looking away. "But there is nowhere else for me to be. I've made my choice."

"You've not died yet," Severus stated. "So stop acting a bloody martyr and get to the tasks assigned to you."

Severus stood and walked out, shutting the door behind him.

"Bullocks," Remus said to the door. "I will when you do."

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><p>He lounged another moment, considering the conversation that he had with Severus. It was probably the most personally they had ever had, but now he couldn't shake the feeling he was forgetting something.<p>

"Oh shite," he stood quickly. He needed to owl Dumbledore and see if he DID have a task assigned to him.

Late the next evening, Severus Snape was grading essays at his desk. Every few minutes he would drop the quill into his ink well and rub his face, wondering, as he did on days such as this, why he had agreed to teaching children. Angry red lines blurred the clumsy writing that filled the page.

Severus decided enough was enough, admitting to himself that the painful throb was now in fact a headache. He moved from his office into his private quarters, dropping his heavy outer robe on a chair in his living room. He was startled by an insistent pecking on one of the windows and hurried to allow the bird entrance.

The midnight black owl hooted at him before dropping a package on the table and flying back out the window. Severus wondered who in Merlin's name would be sending something to him.

He hurried over to the table and swiftly cut the twine bindings and opened the brown paper.

A note sat atop of a bottle of scotch.

_I hope you have not been leading a double life, pretending to be wicked and being really good all the time. That would be hypocrisy._

It was unsigned and Severus snorted at the reference and the scrawl he knew too well. Lupin's handwriting was disgustingly distinguished.

Severus put down the note and poured two fingers full of the scotch. He held it up to the window.

"Touché, Lupin."


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I am a terrible person, neglecting this story and jumping ship for awhile. But I am back.

To my lovely reviewers: keep at it, I love you all and have NOT abandoned this fic. Promise.

**WARNING**: This has officially hit the slash mark, boy on boy is a go.

To my fellow USA East Coasters, PLEASE BE SAFE. I am bundled on the coach watching the news and waiting for Hurricane Irene to hit. I live in Jersey so we have a few hours before anything happens.

Disclaimer: Nope. Even more nothing than before.

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><p><strong>Chapter 4<strong>

Remus knew that something was wrong. Severus leapt from his chair so abruptly that it fell backwards to the floor. Remus knew the darker man was not easily startled nor was he known to miscalculate movements such as that. He didn't even have time to say anything before Severus grimaced at him and walked from the room, robes billowing behind.

Remus sighed. He understood what he was doing. Spying for the order was the easiest way to get the information, even if it meant a tiring role playing game and distrust from every side. Severus lived in this world where everything was a potential threat. Remus wasn't sure he had broken the gates to be allowed in.

They were something though, even if it was undefined.

Three or four times a week they could be found in each other's company. They would talk strategy over brandy, pour over books during research sessions, or even just sit an chat about whatever light subject they could find. Usually those days were just after full moons or particularly bad Death Eater meetings or attacks and neither wanted to think of the dimming world beyond the doors of Grimmauld Place.

They were old and set in their ways so of course they bickered. Not even on his death bed would Remus admit to enjoying those nights the most. It was a good way of relieving stress … well the best he could find at the moment until Severus made a bloody move.

Remus picked up the tumblers of brandy and put away chess board (muggle, because the screams of the stupid pieces interrupted their talks, and Merlin forbid anyone interrupt Severus Snape). He moved the bottle of amber liquid back in the cabinet and sat with his glass in his hand.

He would wait until morning, keeping vigil for if Severus came back, as sometimes he did. Many of the order were in and out, especially the Aurors who used the house to catch up on a few hours of sleep before going out again. Everyone was tense

The children were still present. The Twins had taken residence in their shop where they could keep odd hours, coming back for food before returning to their workplace. The others could be found in the library, looking up spells or potions or finishing homework. Sixth Year would be upon them soon and the even greater threat of the dark lord.

Remus had joined them, sometimes doing his own research, sometimes helping with theirs. It had kept his mind busy, off of the war, his budding whatever with Severus and most importantly Sirius.

He was due for another visit with Emerson Bagnold soon. While they had decided to declare their neutrality formally in the eyes of the Dark Lord, Emerson still wished to consult with him on a few matters. Remus was happy to oblige, knowing that his knowledge could help another generation of untrained werewolves.

Dumbledore thought that if he continued a friendly relationship with the clan, he could sway them to their side. He would make a comment about "no wrong or right and just power" but he'd been channeling Severus too much already and didn't need Dumbledore worried he would suddenly dawn black and run wildly into the night cursing everything that moved.

Still, as he sipped his brandy staring into the fire, Remus couldn't wonder what Severus was doing at this moment. He didn't have to wait long before the fire roared and the man stepped out of the fireplace. Not many people had seen Severus Snape after a Death Eater meeting, after the Dark Lord ravaged his mind in hope of finding information he was not willing to give.

Severus, Remus knew, was always happy to return alive and sane from these meetings. The inner circle was a hard place to be and even a harder place to maintain with the Dark Lord demanding perfection and astronomical feats from his followers.

Remus stood and even though the other man waved him away, he remained silently at his side until he sat down in an overstuffed chair. He waited for a moment to make sure that Severus would be alright before fire calling Dumbledore, who stepped through without prompting.

"My boy," Dumbledore said while sitting in the seat adjacent from Severus. "What can you report?"

"The Dark Lord will assign test to a few new recruits in order to assure loyalties," Severus replied, rubbing his head. Remus walked over to the shelf to get a pain relieving potion that had been placed in the room just for this purpose. "I think the most daunting test will be assigned to the Malfoy boy, he has the most to make up after his father's fall from grace."

They spoke a little longer, hashing out plans and talking about other planned attacks and the upcoming school year.

"How are you?" It was the question that Remus wanted to ask for a while but their relationship never really covered that sort of connection.

"What?" Severus asked back, staring at Remus as if he was a stubborn potions experiment.

"How are you feeling?" Remus questioned again. Severus again stared at him.

"Fine," he said gruffly after a moment, turning away from the werewolf. Remus frowned at his back before pulling Dumbledore's seat closer and sitting down.

They sat there for what seemed like forever before Severus broke the silence.

"You don't need to stay," he said, looking beyond Remus' shoulder at the bookshelf.

"I live here," Remus didn't understand if he was being dismissed or tested but wasn't prepared for either tonight.

"I meant with me," Severus said harshly.

"I knew what you meant," Remus replied, and he did. He had gotten use to these strange boundaries that Severus placed and then toed the line of. "I'm not going anywhere, if you want to though, well I do believe it is your choice to do so."

"Mmm," Severus conceded, apparently accepting Remus' response and letting the issue lie. He slowly stood and under Remus' eye moved to the bookshelf. "I am… unsure of how to progress."

"With what?" Remus asked, though he already knew.

"With … us," Severus admitting something like that told Remus just how invested he was in this friendship and possible relationship. They had too much history to be boyfriends and too much at stake to be lovers. Any relationship was a risk. Between the war and werewolf curses, the happy ending every couple wanted was not an option.

Remus understood all of this and while he didn't know what he wanted, he knew all the risks of the future and wasted time of the past. He knew the man he wanted to be and what he wanted to do. Neither of them had anything to do with restraint.

"Will you die tomorrow?" Remus asked, bracing for uncomfortable topics to be breached.

"I cannot guarantee my future," Severus said, finally staring down Remus with a hardened gaze. "I do not know what will be required of me or what I must do to secure a future. I am bound to two masters—"

"And I the moon," Remus broke, pushing himself towards the darker man. "Neither of us is a seer. There is a war abound Severus and we are making ourselves targets."

"You're not giving me reasons to stay, Lupin," Severus remarked with a touch of hostility

Remus captured Severus's gaze before lunging and capturing the other man's mouth. Remus kissed him with all the passion and longing he could. With all the lust of a man who had wanted so much for so long. Severus stood shocked, and Remus thought he might pull away before his robes were clasped in tight hands.

Severus pulled the smaller man flush against him, flipping them around and crashing Remus into the bookshelf. Volumes topped to the ground around them, neither registering it until they broke for air. Silencing and privacy spells never were taken down from before, so when the men began to kiss again, neither worried about intrusions and allowed for guards to fall.

"Is that reason enough?" Remus asked after they finally separated themselves, still tugging at each other's robes, trying to remove them to bare skin.

"I do believe it's a start," Severus replied, latching onto Remus' collarbone. The other man moaned, fingers stilled from where they were unbuttoning Severus's shirt.

The charms didn't come down until early morning, long after Severus had flooed back to Hogwarts and Remus had righted the room back to its original state. He was happier than he had been in a long time, if not more sore.

Remus didn't know where he and Severus were, but suddenly he wasn't so worried about it.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I am thinking about just keeping it teen for now and posting the smutty stuff on my livejournal (which I will link to in my profile if I do).

Send me feedback and fanfiction love.


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